kay eva, marie, bagyo, gagambala at ericka...

maraming salamat sa mga ala-alang iniwan nyo. masaya akong nakilala ko kayong lahat! mahal na mahal ko kayo guys! ingat! nyahahaha! Dahil senyo masaya ang SYM! go BIG 250! hehehe!

kahit kelan di ko naramdaman na nakakapagod kang mahalin...

ngayon lang...



--- very special love...

magmamahal ka pa rin kahit ang sakit sakit...

isa to sa mga emo posts na gagawin ko...


masakit na...
nakakapagod manlimos ng atensyon na di mo rin pala ibibigay,

sana di mo na ko pinagstay.

masmasaya yun...

kaso, wala



masakit...


nakakasakit na KAYO!

walang joke, masaya ako ngayon...

all the while akala ko kelangan ko ng ibang tao para maging masaya, well, hindi pala, hahaha! masaya ako ngayon, nag-eenjoy ako kasama ibang tao. Masaya ako mag-isa...

a tribute to my partner-in-crime, the all powerful: John Alex Banawa

he worked his ass off with they lay-out of the college publication and i only saw him stressed was when the freakin' printer wont cooperate with us. I am very thankful for having him as my lay-out artist because we are so in the same page. Harhar! people often pull us down by saying stuff here and there but well, ehem! look at the products of our lovin' labor!


harhar!

Petrichor

(inspired by the new word i learned today from the internet)
(thanks to John Alex Banawa for the complimentary words and phrases)

Petrichor

The smell of the earth starts to get to me,

aware of the love that will never be.

All these would be a lasting memory

Of you and me in sweet serenity.

As warmth touches my numbed senses once more,

Your painful silence overwhelms my soul

Looking back, I see you and me no more

Visions of you, all smeared with mud and coal

Candy-colored ark reigns over the sky

this, for me, is the sign to say goodbye.

Ephemeral Elysium’s destined end:

Farewell, the only thing broken hearts lend.

My Pivot

A Life-turning Experience



Last March 2008, our Theater Arts class was preparing for a stage play for the Holy Week. It was a really stressful activity for the whole class but I felt more pressured because I was the director of the play. All the drama and the stress were starting to get to me. I was starting to get so irritable and so moody. I was a mess. Good thing my classmates and my batch mates never gave up on me. They were always there supporting me with the preparations for the play. Everything was going well until the night of the last performance came. Last minute preparations were done to make the blocking of the actors better. Our professor in theater Arts helped me out with this adjustments and it was only thirty minutes till show time.

One of my classmates did not like the fact that I let our professor over rule my on my role as the director. He said that I should have asserted what I had in mind and we should have stuck with what was rehearsed. At that point, though, all I could think of was to make the show a worthwhile material for the people to reflect on for the Holy Week more than executing the play for get the grade, I was more concerned with giving the people something to ponder on. And so, the violent reactions from that particular classmate brought me down, that made me question myself and my capacity as a director.

I felt really devastated. I was crying but I tried hard not to make them see the tears, I did not want them to think that I was weak. One of my classmates saw me while I was fixing my costume, he asked me what was wrong and at first I was hesitant to tell the story, and when I did, he hugged me and told me that it was not my fault and that I did not have to take all the blame for myself. He said that I did all that I could to make the play a good one and that I should not be feeling bad at all. He says that I should try not to take everything in. “Do your best in the things that you do and God will do the rest.”

It was an incident that I still treasure to this day. I do not know if he still remembers the things he said to me that night, but those words really inspired me. I started to just let things go when I have done my part. I used to have the tendency to just embrace all the jobs and do everything at the same time, but now, I have learned to know my limitations.

I am very grateful to that friend of mine. Until today, he’s my source of daily doses of sanity that keep my grounded.

A Reflection on The Music Child

The Music Child
Alfred A. Yuson
(1991)



I never believed that the older people get, the more they know how to deal with the things that come their way. Older people tend to complicate things, they tend to seek the deeper meaning of this, which is not bad at all, but sometimes, things are not to be overanalyzed all the time. Some things in this life are simple; the answers to most of our problems are often given to us, laid down in front of us.

I admire children when they talk to each other, they see the world as something so pretty and something so beautiful, they appreciate what some of us don’t and yes, they seem to have all the answers. Children share, adults rarely do, children tell the people they love that they appreciate them, adults have a great deal of a hard time doing this. I can’t seem to reconcile why adults have to let go of some good habits when they grow up. Those little habits keep peace reigning. I am not saying that adults are responsible for the chaos and the turmoil, it’s just that, adults seem to have forgotten what joy it brings to just keep things simple, forgive and forget, give and take. Simple. These habits will keep our world spinning for us.

A Reflection on The Ghost

The Ghost
Connie Jan Maraan
(1990)



This story got me thinking: if I were to die right here and right now, what would my unfinished business be? Well, probably a lot. I have to complete a couple of subjects, I have to get my transcript of records from UPLB, I have to see my mom and tell her that I love her so much, I have to be able to kiss Marius, and I have to settle some scores with some of my friends.

The most serious unfinished business that I have would probably sound a little mushy and a little corny but it is of a love not told. I currently like someone very much---not in a romantic way (oh, well, yeah, maybe in a romantic way, but moreover…) but I am fonder of being with this someone than fantasizing about me and him getting married. If I would die now, I would probably volunteer to be his guardian angel, I would watch him from above, and just be with him as much as I want to, though he might never know it, it is okay with me. I am more like a martyr than a lover who fights for love. I am more likely to get contented loving a person silently, I have complications.

A Reflection on the Ghost

The Ghost
Connie Jan Maraan
(1990)



This story got me thinking: if I were to die right here and right now, what would my unfinished business be? Well, probably a lot. I have to complete a couple of subjects, I have to get my transcript of records from UPLB, I have to see my mom and tell her that I love her so much, I have to be able to kiss Marius, and I have to settle some scores with some of my friends.

The most serious unfinished business that I have would probably sound a little mushy and a little corny but it is of a love not told. I currently like someone very much---not in a romantic way (oh, well, yeah, maybe in a romantic way, but moreover…) but I am fonder of being with this someone than fantasizing about me and him getting married. If I would die now, I would probably volunteer to be his guardian angel, I would watch him from above, and just be with him as much as I want to, though he might never know it, it is okay with me. I am more like a martyr than a lover who fights for love. I am more likely to get contented loving a person silently, I have complications.

A Reflection on the Music Child

The Music Child
Alfred A. Yuson
(1991)



I never believed that the older people get, the more they know how to deal with the things that come their way. Older people tend to complicate things, they tend to seek the deeper meaning of this, which is not bad at all, but sometimes, things are not to be overanalyzed all the time. Some things in this life are simple; the answers to most of our problems are often given to us, laid down in front of us.

I admire children when they talk to each other, they see the world as something so pretty and something so beautiful, they appreciate what some of us don’t and yes, they seem to have all the answers. Children share, adults rarely do, children tell the people they love that they appreciate them, adults have a great deal of a hard time doing this. I can’t seem to reconcile why adults have to let go of some good habits when they grow up. Those little habits keep peace reigning. I am not saying that adults are responsible for the chaos and the turmoil, it’s just that, adults seem to have forgotten what joy it brings to just keep things simple, forgive and forget, give and take. Simple. These habits will keep our world spinning for us.

My Pivot

A Life-turning Experience

Last March 2008, our Theater Arts class was preparing for a stage play for the Holy Week. It was a really stressful activity for the whole class but I felt more pressured because I was the director of the play. All the drama and the stress were starting to get to me. I was starting to get so irritable and so moody. I was a mess. Good thing my classmates and my batch mates never gave up on me. They were always there supporting me with the preparations for the play. Everything was going well until the night of the last performance came. Last minute preparations were done to make the blocking of the actors better. Our professor in theater Arts helped me out with this adjustments and it was only thirty minutes till show time.

One of my classmates did not like the fact that I let our professor over rule my on my role as the director. He said that I should have asserted what I had in mind and we should have stuck with what was rehearsed. At that point, though, all I could think of was to make the show a worthwhile material for the people to reflect on for the Holy Week more than executing the play for get the grade, I was more concerned with giving the people something to ponder on. And so, the violent reactions from that particular classmate brought me down, that made me question myself and my capacity as a director.

I felt really devastated. I was crying but I tried hard not to make them see the tears, I did not want them to think that I was weak. One of my classmates saw me while I was fixing my costume, he asked me what was wrong and at first I was hesitant to tell the story, and when I did, he hugged me and told me that it was not my fault and that I did not have to take all the blame for myself. He said that I did all that I could to make the play a good one and that I should not be feeling bad at all. He says that I should try not to take everything in. “Do your best in the things that you do and God will do the rest.”

It was an incident that I still treasure to this day. I do not know if he still remembers the things he said to me that night, but those words really inspired me. I started to just let things go when I have done my part. I used to have the tendency to just embrace all the jobs and do everything at the same time, but now, I have learned to know my limitations.

I am very grateful to that friend of mine. Until today, he’s my source of daily doses of sanity that keep my grounded.

About me: (as seen on friendster)

describe myself?

i am about 5"3 in height, chubby, almost fair-skinned, sometimes pale pa nga eh.

right now, my hair is growing long na, unlike before na i cut my hair short after three months. Dry ang hair ko, resulta siguro ng pagkukulay ko ng sarili kong buhok nung summer.

I have huge thighs, i am fat nga kasi, hahaha! and my arms are short daw.

(do i seem monstrous yet?!) hehehe!

I do not have have good skin, medyo marami na yung pimples ko, plus the scars...(derma please!)

my eyebrows are not okay, i mean, they are not leech-thick pero medyo unruly kasi.

my nose naman is not pango pero may kalakihan, i have full lips, konti na lang daw, auto-pout na. (Thank you, Lord!)

I have nice teeth though, not pearly white pero hindi crooked. Sabi nila, my smile is pretty daw. (Blushes :))

I have big eyes daw, pero i'd rather call it deep! hehehe! my eyes are puffy kaya siguro sometimes i appear to have huge eyebags.

Sabi naman nila, kahit mataba ako, may shape naman katawan ko kasi may evident curve naman na makikita, for my size, hindi ako mukhang barrel! hahaha!


ayun, so you now can pretty much draw a picture of me...

out for three days...

retreat namin so mawawala ako ng tatlong araw. be back on sunday....

Wishlist para sa birthday ko...

1. PUG puppy... gusto ko sana yung cream and black...
2. laptop computer. katulad nung kay jules...music edition ata yun ng HP...

HP Pavilion dv2800 Artist Entertainment Notebook PC series

3. digital camera, yung sa canon ixus...
4. new chucks...
5. new bag...
5. hoodie jacket...
6. a really nice printer...
7. PSP! waaaah!
8. mernel's cake
9. chocolate ice cream...
10. clover na green
11. yogurt na mango
12. kfc bucket meal
13. cheesy bacon mushroon burger...
14. hershey's pie from BK
15. HK trip...
16. Palawan experience...
17. vacation sa pampanga...
18. dance with Gforce
19. cotton candy
20. fic
21. dried mangoes...
22. star apple]
23. turon
24. kwek-kwek
25. pansit canton

We are Shakespeare

August 27, 2008

Our midterm exam for our English and American literature class was scheduled at 8 am. I unfortunately overslept and arrived at 8:15. It was okay though for the program started at around 8:30, but thinking that i still had to dress up, i had to move fast. My classmates and i werequite nervous about the whole recital thing. I was not ready. Haha! but i think i made a good presentation. The judges were so good to us!

Sino daw ako?

i live a double life...

a part of me is the shallow, loud mouth people see often... i laugh a lot and i talk a lot. i appear to be rather stupid... a push over...

the other part of me is the cold and bitter person, i speak seldom but i have the answers. i am the thinker. this part of me is the smart one. i never let my feelings get in the way, this is the part that has forgotten to feel...
somewhere between these two hides the silent deviant... a rebel... a happy rebel... damaged, broken, scrarred, imperfect... but hey, nobody is perfect... i am trying to be normal... i am attempting to live a happy life. I am trying to see the essence of living inspite of all the pain. i am trying to let "me" show... trying to be there for people as much as possible without conforming. i am going against the norms, defying the rules... i am trying to live life the way i want to, guided by the values i have kept in my heart. i follow the inner compass that leads us all to where we're supposed to go... i am risking getting hurt and being rejected. i am embracing all my issues, i am owning my mistakes, i am living and loving it... i love. i try to be human, i am in the process of thawing my cold heart. i am in the process of regaining the ability of feeling---something that i have forgotten to do after all these years...

convinced that i am born for greater things, i try to maximize my potentials... i am done with mediocrity... gone are the years of effortless victories... i will make the most out of every opportunity laid before me... i will be someone significant....
whew... rather ambitious, don't you think???! *winks*

My favorite SLA Pics

These pictures were taken sa may gate ng Elementary department ng Caritas Don Bosco nung SLA. hehehe! ang cute lang, super feeling close na kami sa isa't isa... ang dami namin nahakot para maki-isa sa pagiging cam whores namin. hehehe!

sa mga tropa sa DBA

It might seem a little bit late for this but i, in behalf of my friends and tropaness from DB Canlubang, would like to thank you for always being nice to us and being ever so supportive of us! ahahaha! ang sweet!

BUSKOLEHIYO: super habol day part 1

aba naman, parang lima lang kaming gumawa ng buong college publication! kamusta naman yun? kahit gusto ko magexact sa kanila, di naman pwede, alex always tells me to calm myself down pag medyo umiinit na ulo ko sa pag aatittude problem ng imga nakakasama ko. Di naman masyadong masama loob ko, may ilan naman na nagpaalam na di sila makakapunta pero yung iba, pinag aksayahan ko na nga sila ng piso kahit ibang network sila eh... huhuhu! di manlangnagreply. To think na sila pa yung nag sign ng pangalan nila to be a part of this.

wakey-wakey! we have an issue to finish!

Wall-E

Directed by Andrew Stanton

Produced by Jim Morris

Distributed by Walt Disney Pictures

“The production of too many useful things results in too many useless people. “ ~ Karl Marx

Wall.E is a feel good movie that will get you thinking afterwards. More than the special friendship between Wall.E and Eve, the movie speaks of many social and environmental issues. This movie shows how man can be enslaved by their own creations. Humans were pictured as very lazy people, dependent on technology to survive, they weren’t even living life. They do not touch, they do not talk face to face, and they just communicate through the hologram screens in their floating chairs. They were helpless without technology. Time came when the captain of the ship realized that they need to give back to their home: Earth. Earth is not as miserable as man thought it was, it just needed people to look after it. He drew hope from a plant potted on a shoe. He had two choices, to remain surviving comfortably in the Axiom, or to lead his people to go home to Earth. The captain chose to do better. He did not want to remain useless, he wanted to live.

BAKIT BALIKTAD MAGBASA NG LIBRO ANG MGA PILIPINO?

I got this from (http://nakanampucha.wordpress.com/2007/06/29/bob-ong/) wala lang, nakakatuwa, ito yung favorite part ko dun sa libro...

thank you!

I took this from Bob Ong’s book “bakit baliktad magbasa ng libro ang mga pilipino?”. I think that it’s down ass funny… Bob Ong is a funny guy… really funny omg funny..lol…well I think he is..lol

Lumalabas ang kakulangan natin sa iodize salt pagdating sa mga trivia game show sa TV. Mapa Family-Feud, The weakest Link, o Gobingo, hindi pahuhuli sa pagalingan ang mga mamamayang Pilipino, lalo na sa kung mabilisan!

SET THE CLOCK….

Host: Ano sa Ingles ang “hinlalaki”?
Contestant: Thumbmark

Host: Ano ang ginagamitng mga swimmers para bumilis ang kanilang paglanggoy?
Contestant: Fast Shoes

Host: Kung si Superman ay may Lois Lane, ano naman ang kay Robinhood?
contestant: Pana.

Host: Anong “S” ang inuupuan pag nakasakay sa kabayo?
contestant: Silya

Host: Ano ang karaniwang hugis ng manibela?
contestant: Triangular

Host: Hindi ito boob, hindi ito tube, pero tinatawag ng iba na boob tube. Ano ito?
contestant: Bra

Host: Kelan ang Pasko sa Davao?
contestant: PASS…

Host: Anong tawag sa isdang hindi bilasa?
contestant: tuyo

Host: Ilan ang legs ng cartoon character na si Spiderman?
contestant: Eight

Host: Ano ang nationality ng sanggol na may amang Filipino Catholic at Protestanteng Ina?
Contestant: American

Host: Merong four seasons: winter, spring, summer, at fall. kelan nahuhulog ang mga dahon?
contestant: sa storm

Host: Anong bukol ang makikita sa leeg ng mga lalaki?
contestant: Kiss mark

Host: ano ang kulay ng orange juice kapag nilagay sa blue na baso?
contestant: …Violet

Host: anong malambot na bahagi sa ulo ng sanggol?
contestant: batok

Host: magbigay ng bagay na ipini-pin sadamit?
contestant: Hairpin

Host: Ano ang nagpapaalat sa itlog na maalat?
contestant: Puti

Host: ano ang tawag sa mga needle-like projections na nakasabit sa ceiling ng mga caves?
contestant: Ice pick

Host: ano ang tawag sa plastic bag na lalagyan ng basura?
contestant: plastic bag na nilalagyan ng basura.

Host: anong C ang paboritong kainin ng mga rabbit?
contestant: Cacamber

Host: ang urine ay liquid: TRUE OR FALSE
contestant: False

Host: anong ang system n g MAth na gumagamit ng symbols instead of numbers?
contestant: ummm…China?

Host: anong ginawa ni MOses sa Red Sea?
contestant: Stop

Host: what is the capital of the Philippines?
contestant: P

Host: anong klaseng sapatos ang ginagamit ng mga basketbolista?
contestant: adidas

Host: sino ang pumatay kay David?
contestant: Goliath

host: ano ang tawag sa taong walang suot sa paa?
contestant: Slipperless

Host: kung ang bulag ay blind ano naman ang english ng pipi?
contestant: Walang salita

Host: anong sea creature ang kalahating kabayo at kalahating isda?
contestant: syokoy

Host: ano ang nasa gitna ng donut?
contestant: palaman

Host: ang salad dressing ba ay damit
contestant: (sandaling nagisip) YES!

Host: Anong klaseng sasakyan ang inaayos sa hangar?
contestant: sirang sasakyan

host: ano ang nilalagay sa sewing machine?
contestant: lagari?

host: ilan taon meron sa leap year?
contestant: 365

host: anong hayop ang di-nakakakita sa sa araw ngunit nakakakita sa dilim?
contestant: flashlight

host: Ano ang tawag sa laro kung saan ang dalawang team ang naghihilahan sa isang lubid?
contestant: tumbang-preso

host: kung manicure sa kamay, ano ang sa paa?
contestant: kuko

host: ano ang isunusuot ng mg boksingero sa ulo nila bilang proteksyon?
contestant: Sumbrero

host: ano ang tawag sa laman sa loob ng buto: marrow or muscle?
contestant: karne

host: para saa ang anti-dandruff shampoo?
contestant: kuto

host: anong englis ng ampalaya?
contestant: asparagus

host: ilang metro mayroon sa 300 meters?
contestant: 3000

host: anong sasakyan ang gamit sa “tour de france”?
contestant: Kalesa

Host: ano ang kasunod ng kidlat?
contestant: sunog

host: saan matatagpuan ang Quebec?
contestant: afghanistan

host: tinuturo ang G-clef sa anong “M” na subject?
contestant: Mathematics

host: ano ang halaman na tumitiklop kapag ito’y nahawakan?
contestant: Hiya-hiya

host: ano ang itlog na ayon sa iba, nakakapagpatigas ng tuhod?
contestant: TAMA!

host: ano ang isinusuot ng taong walang buhok?
contestant: Kalbo

host: anong zip ang ginagamit sa pagbukas ng pantalon?
contestant: pagbukas ng bag

host: anong “D” ang first word sa stanza ng JIngle bells?
contestant: dyingel?

host: anong “H” ang tawag sa taong nagiisa?
contestant: home alone

host: Sa anong bansa nakatira ang mga Hindu?
contestant: hindunesia

host: kungang ubo ay sa bibig, ano naman ang sa ilong?
contestant: Vicks

host: ano ang kulay ng strawberry?
contestant: ube

host: anong klaseng animal ang Afghan Hound?
contestant: Afghanistan

host: sinong American president ang nagkapolyo noong 1920’s
contestant: Apolinario Mabini..

The War

The War

Luigi Pirandello

(1867-1936)

Reading the story made me remember my dad. I don’t remember much about him but according to what his friends tell of him; my dad is a loving and affectionate person. He is reserved but is very cheerful. They say that my dad has a lot of plans for me and my brothers. I know for a fact that he wanted me to be either a ballet dancer or a gymnast. He’s a simple person; he is contented having simple things in life for as long as me and my brothers get the best things life could offer.

My father loved me and my brothers equally. He never believed in playing favorites. One clear memory of my father I have is the one where he was scolding me and my older brother. We were fighting on who between us did daddy love more. Daddy explained that he loved us equally, that he loves me in the same way he loves my brothers, regardless of who was born first.

That memory was affirmed by this story that a father loves his children through and through. He wants the best for his children, he has nothing but the best intentions for them. It hurts to realize that no matter how much I try to get my father back I can’t. I am to live a whole lifetime without my daddy.

The Loss and the Healing

A Reflection on “The Loss and the Healing” by Sigrid Undset

Losing a loved one is hard, especially when one would think of the times he took that person for granted. There would be these “what if’s” and “should have, would have, could have’s.” I personally went through all these, coping death, moving on. I still can’t say I have moved on completely. It has been 14 years since my father died and sometimes, I still find myself in denial. I still wait for him to come back home. I think that is what’s good with us people, we hope against all hopes, we dare to believe in the impossible.

I could say that I was not able to process the death of my father well because I was too young back then. I was not able to address the pain the right way. I believe the key to moving on is processing the emotions well. It’s either we move on with smiles in our faces or we move on with bitterness and coldness. Moving on after a loss is not something we should rush, there is a saying that says time heals all wounds, I believe it is true. Time would kiss all the pain away. Moving on after a loss doesn’t mean we forget about the person, moving on is learning to live without the person, but it is never about forgetting how life was with him. Memories of that person should keep us going. I believe people meet after death. Those who have departed on us just went ahead on this new journey. They live their life after death and we live our life on earth, then maybe, just maybe, we meet again.

The Search

The Search

Romain Gary

(1914- )

I am an escape artist. I try to find my way out of the bad situations I get myself into. I always try to find the easy way out. I am not contented with my life. When the times that I am unhappy with the way things go for me, I try to make myself believe that I am living in a different world. I pretend that I don’t know this life. Sometimes, reality scares me to the point that I almost want to give up on living and just escapes. Many times I have imagined myself just drifting far from where I am right now.

I have always tried to prove my worth to the people around me, I hate being compared to people, especially when I know that I’ll never be of the same level as that certain someone. As I was growing up, I was always compared to my best friend; she’s smart and pretty, very talented and friendly. I am not that. I have lived my high school life trying to make people see that I am smart but I don’t want to be recognized. I don’t want to exhaust myself trying to get all the medals available for awarding. I was only able to step out of the shadows when I left UPLB. It was a drastic move to make everyone see that I am not willing to be someone else’s dummy. Escaping out of the shadows, I did that being a deviant. Defying the norms and disobeying the rules my society has imposed on me. I am an escape artist.

Gym Period

Gym Period

Rainer Maria Rilke

(1875-1926)

I have the tendency to treat others as if they are inferior especially when I think they are not as smart as me. I enjoy classifying people, boxing them in a certain label that I often find funny. I seldom realize that this causes people to feel bad about themselves. Maybe this is because I grew up constantly trying to prove my worth to the people I am supposed to call family. They have looked down on me, they believe that I won’t amount to anything really special or exceptional. I project my issues to other people. Instead of helping them feel better and just embrace their flaws, I make fun of them and I make them feel like they’re hopeless.

I can say that I can relate with almost every character in the story. I can see myself in Gruber, the one who’s constantly trying to prove his worth, not only to others but also to himself, to Jerome, the kind friend who’s trying to make other’s see what they’re really made of, and those who never believed in anyone. This story got me thinking of how the people I “mistreated” could have felt.

Earliest Memories

Earliest Memories

Arthur Koestler

(1905- )

Guit. Fear. Loneliness. I have had my share of those since I was young. Though I am not really comfortable discussing these things, this story got me to reflect on them.

My earliest memory of guilt and fear was when I was tasked to take care of my younger brother. I took my brother to the playground, I forgot to watch over him because I was too busy playing with my friends. He only got my attention when he was crying. He fell from where he was sitting and his forehead hid the corner of a table. His head swelled up and it turned blue and black. I was scared when we went home because mom might scold me, but my younger brother did not cry, when he was asked what happened to him, he just said that he fell because he did not listen to me. My brother didn’t want me to get in trouble.

My earliest memory of loneliness was when my daddy died when I was five. It was a sad experience for the whole family. The worst part was when we returned home after dad was buried, it was then that I realized that things will never be the same again. Dad won’t be coming home anymore; I won’t be seeing my father dance in a funny way whenever he’s trying to make my mom notice him. I do not have my father with me anymore.

I think it is quite unfair that memories of guilt, fear and loneliness marks my childhood, but I can’t do anything about it now. I just have to make the most out of my life now.

A Reflection on the "Bridal Ballad" by Edgar Allan Poe

Bridal Ballad

by Edgar Allan Poe

The ring is on my hand,

And the wreath is on my brow;

Satin and jewels grand

Are all at my command,

And many a rood of land

And I am happy now.

And my lord he loves me well;

But, when first he breathed his vow,

I felt my bosom swell—

And the voice seemed his who fell

For the words rang as a knell,

In the battle down the dell,

And who is happy now.

But he spoke to re-assure me,

And he kissed my pallid brow,

While a reverie came o'er me,

And to the church-yard bore me,

And I sighed to him before me,

"Oh, I am happy now!"

And thus the words were spoken,

And this the plighted vow,

And, though my faith be broken,

And, though my heart be broken,

Behold the golden token

That proves me happy now!

Would God I could awaken!

For I dream I know not how!

And my soul is sorely shaken

Lest an evil step be taken,—--

Lest the dead who is forsaken

May not be happy now.

“Sometimes when we are into something for quite sometime, we tend to forget what we’re there for. We tend to forget what we are fighting for. We become scared, we feel empty, and we start to doubt. But there would always be that something or someone to remind us of the purpose of all the pain and the possible heartbreaks.

When a person decides to be happy, he should be aware of the reality that the road to being happy is not an easy path to take, many sacrifices has to be made, many hearts should be broken along the way, and yes, even one’s own heart could be at risk. It’s just a matter of never losing faith and knowing what one wants for these things would keep him on track.

This poem for me speaks of the pre-nuptial jitters a bride gets when she realizes the great commitment she’s getting herself into: scary and complicated, but she still dives in it willingly, for she knows she will be happy. She believes that she will be happy."

If I were Huck Finn, Where Would I Go?

When I don’t like the place I am in, I always dream of going far, escaping from everything, I like going to Don Bosco Batulao. It is a breath of fresh air compared to my normal environment. The serene ambience makes me feel relaxed and it comforts my stressed body. I just like sitting there and just staying quiet. When alone, I am awfully quiet. I don’t talk much because when I am alone, those are the times that I get to be in touch with my real self. I get to reflect on the things that I have done. And I get to see why my life turned out to be like this.

But of course, Don Bosco Batulao is not a place where I can stay for a long time, that is why I’ll go to the airport and fly to Paris. Since I was a child I have always been fascinated with the lifestyles of the Parisians. It would be a great place to start my adventures, living alone. There I could study Culinary Arts and since it is the gallimaufry of different cultures, I could see have the whole world in one city. I would go and see the Eiffel Tower, go shopping in their great stores and just live the life. It would be a place to just treat myself for a job well done, and just enjoy my life. It would be a great place to start my life over.

At the end of the day, I would still want to be back home in the arms of my family, because no matter how unfair my life could be, my family would always be the people I would come home to. That may not be my real family, but the family I choose for myself.

Pa-post lang...

post ko dito mga pinasa kong requirements sa English-American Literature, Creative Writing at Contemporary Literature.

On Attachment...

This afternoon, I sat beside my classmate Jules during my Educational Research Class. We got into this conversation about attachment and detachment. I actually, it was more like me talking and him listening to me.

I fear being attached to people, but in contradiction to that fear, I seem to be a very friendly person on the outside, I like being with people, I don’t like being alone. After leaving UPLB, I resolved not to be attached to people anymore, because in UP, I depended on people for my happiness, I depended on my friends whenever I was to make a decision, and not many people know that I left UP partly because one of my dearest friends decided to leave UP. I could not imagine my life in UP without him, (sounds too mushy…and it kind of freaks me out too…) let me put it this way; I find it hard to imagine my life in UP not having him around… (Does that sound better?) Anyways, so there, I left UP and when I decided to move to don Bosco I kind of promised myself that I would be concentrating more in my academics rather than my social night for I have had my great share of the life with friends when I was in UP. But later on, I realized that being attached to people is kind of inevitable. And slowly, I was yet again on the same pit I was on a year ago. The only difference is that this time, I felt good about it. I did not look at my batch mates as mere classmates, I treated them like family. I love them so much, and after almost three years of togetherness, I am definitely attached to them.

Attachment to them is not bad, not at all, but there would come a time when I would have to learn to detach from them, for my growth, for our friendships’ growths. I fear the time when I would have to do that. I would tell my self, “Pa’no na sila kung wala ako?” but moreover, “Pa’no na ako kung wala sila?” I can’t seem to imagine life without them. I am scared of the pain, that’s why last summer I tried to detach myself from them which was kind of unsuccessful. I prayed, “Please, wag po muna…di ko pa po yata kaya ng wala sila…” I know that time will come I would have to learn to detach, but I hope I’d be given more time, more time to gain enough strength. Haaay…

This is basically the reason why Patrick Menorca said that I was a walking contradict. I do against what I feel. A great pretender.

But I guess, that is life, people come and go. As what Jules said, “Time and people may leave, but memories will be treasured forever.”

super stressed me...

preparations sa SLA really wore me out, dagdag mo pa dyan yung personal struggles ko...

here's a shout out to the people na nasigawan ko at nabugahan ko ng sama ng loob nitong nakaraan:

SORRY

kay jerome cortes: super inaway-away ko after ng SLA...

kina alex, arvin, lloyd, nene, thriza, madel, ruby, lino at earl, dagdag ulit si Jerome....ful;l force ng kabadtripan ko during dance practices...

sa mga taga Caritas na tinaray tarayan ko...

kay frank from makati na super inaway away ko...

sa mga natarayan kong delegates...

sa mga taga canlubang...

kay ma'am bot...

kay aries at jerome quinto...

sa mga taong nakilala, makita at makasama...

kina:
ian punsalan
alex at aris
raffy at gabby
borgie
ron

bea
dada
aileen

enzo at frank

sa tga tarlac na pinangakuan kong payat na ko next SLA...

sa mga taga Canluabg na sabik sa camera...

kay fr. Eli...
fr. jay
fr. jun
fr. vester at fr. dudz...


SOLID ang SLA dahil sa inyo...

sa mga taong nakilala, makita at makasama...

kina:
ian punsalan
alex at aris
raffy at gabby
borgie
ron

bea
dada
aileen

enzo at frank

sa tga tarlac na pinangakuan kong payat na ko next SLA...

sa mga taga Canluabg na sabik sa camera...

kay fr. Eli...
fr. jay
fr. jun
fr. vester at fr. dudz...


SOLID ang SLA dahil sa inyo...

"Aim for Heaven"

"Lilipad na ako,
sabayan nyo ako
ang sarap dito,
sa pupuntahan ko..."


Sabini Fr. Mon, this song was composed and sung daw way brfore Raymond Marasigan was born, according to him in his homily, this song was first sung by Mary as she was taken up to heaven. She invites us to join her. Heaven is not a place up there, we can have heaven here and now.

The love of our family,
the company of our friends,
beautiful smiles on children's faces...
THAT"S HEAVEN: HERE AND NOW.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

This evening, i was about to go home when i was torn between two choices, whether to pass by the chapel or not. I usually go to the chapel before i go home but i was unusually tardy to go and visit God kanina. Then I thought that i would be walking home so I might as well ask for a little guidance from Him. So, i went to the chapel. The seminarians, then, were having their Benediction. Almost reaching the Shrine's door, i saw a friend sitting on the plant box. I tapped his shoulder and when he turned, i saw him crying. My heart broke at that instant. I have never seen him cry, ever. He's a very strong guy. Oftentimes, i depend on him for strength. I felt pain on my insides, as if my heart was being twisted. I hugged him, because i was at a loss for the right words to say. I hugged him tight and I told him, "Kaya mo yan!", though i was not really sure of what was running through his head. I left him for a while because i did not want to cry with him. I thought that i should at least stand strong for him. I went inside the chapel and the song that was playing gave me the chills.

"Be not afraid, I go beore you always. Come, follow me and i will give you rest."

I felt as if God was telling me exactly this. That i should not be scared. I looked at my friend again who was looking at the Sacred Host from the outside. Maybe he was tired, I thought. I prayed for him hard. I did not want to see him in pain, not like that. I went out again and gave him a tight hug and left. I was crying while i was walking. I felt weak. I have always seen that friend of mne as someone so strong and yet, he was there, weak and hurting. I was not able to do anything. People get tired of being who they are and when they do, they turn to the One who could give us much comfort. At one point or another we fall into our knees, we get weak, we become the human beings we truly are and we turn to Him. When we get scared of what lies before us, we flee to Him like children. We turn to Him for strength, for inspiration, we turn to God for love. Seeing my friend like that, made me look into myself. I am weak too. I am not that strong, i fall down so many times more that that friend of mine. And it is okay to cry, it is okay to admit that i can't go on anymore and that i need rest. it is okay to get weak, to get tired. It is okay. There is this someone who love me still and He will never get tired of listening to me cry. Even if we are not the most attractive people when we cry, He'll lovingly look at us and listen. We must not be afraid to admit that we are human, afterall, it is how He made us to be. I know my friend is hurting, but i leave it to God to comfort Him. I realized that his situation may be way beyond what i can understand. That's why i leave it to the one who knows best. That's another thing i learned today, learn to let go and let things flow. There would come times where things would go beyond my powers and i must leave it to God and just let Him to the rest. I must not be afraid for he's always with me...

Rector's Day

The first day of August was indeed a great day for all Bosconians from Canlubang. we celebrate the birthday of Fr. Louie Castañeda, SDB the Rector of Don Bosco College. It was a gloomy day having rain showers here and there, but that did not stop the Bosconians from brightening up the day with their mighty cheers and yells.

The Bosconians showcased their presentations for Fr. Rector. Personally, the TVET students brought the house down with their very entertaining production numbers. Ron and I hosted the event and it was fun to see the Bosconians give their all to put on a good show.

I would commend the seminarials also for the wonderful Doxology, they were really, and i mean, really good.

Fr. Louie announced that the classes will be cut in the afternoon, this added to the happiness of the Bosconians. It was a great experience for me and i thnk, for everybody.

my Elysium

"national level na ito!"

Me getting into all sorts of activities and being a leader of some sort, me representing the college department in gatherings here and there, there and here...Ma'am Bot and i would often joke about this and just laugh about it. But come to think of it, what if i really got to the national level? from someone so insignificant, i'll be someone that people would recognize and people would (hopefully) love...it's so nice to think about it and just dream...i imagine candy colored clouds and just pink stuff...all glittery and shiny. but then my dream bubble would suddenly pop. *pop* all gone.

ako: Jessa Mariel, ikaw pa ba yan?
ako2: bakit? hindi na ba?
ako: kelan ka pa nag-enjoy mag-alive-alive, magleader-leaderan jan?
ako2: ngayon, nag-eenjoy ako...
ako: tingin mo ba ikaw yung nagugustuhan nila, at di yung magarang pabalat na pinaglagyan mo sa sarili mo?
ako2: sana...
ako: Ikaw na rin ang nagsabi na ayaw mo na ng mga bagay na di sigurado, pano na tayo?

*pop*
back to me...ayun nga, sometimes i feel na di na ako yung minamahal ng tao, kasi i'm not really the friendly type, i'm not the kind of person who always wear this happy cheerface when you see me. I'm gloomy may pagka-emo pa...

pero what if this is me and i'm really born for this? ad maiora natus, born for greater things nga diba? baka ito na yung great things na sinasabi nila? why deprive myself of such great opportunities?


conclusion: take each day as a new one, enjoy the things given, grab the opportunities handed down...learn from each mistake and resolve to do better...



whew! hirap mag-isa!

"My Favorite Mistake"

i found this somewhere in my notes as i was cleaning up my stuff. It was dated December 30, 2006. I wrote it, and i can't remember why...


"i don't know how it all started, i don't even want to remeber why. i just find myself looking for it, missing it: those little stolen moments i get to have those little peeks to heaven. the deafening silence breaks my heart, but then it also builds up in me this tingling sensation i just can't resist. with a flick of a finger, with that little smile, i cannot but want it more and more. this little things keep me sane, these little things keep me here. i'd give up anything for a little more of this, just a little more. i don't know when all these will be taken away from me, but i am loving the little rendezvous, the holding of the hands, the sweet kisses, i am loving him, silently, SILENTLY. He doesn't know, or maybe he does, i think he loves me. but all these will be soon taken away from me. I'll miss the touch, i'll miss the kiss, then all of these. All gone. SILENTLY... silently."

Youth groups ko....

na-realize ko ang dami kong sinign-up-an na youth groups:

Auxilium (The mArian Liturgy Group) ---syempre, pioneer ako nyan eh! hehehe!
Street Jazz ---honorary member ako last year! (self-proclaimed) fwehahaha!
Folk Dance ---frustration ko to nung high school
Utak-Berde ---gusto ko yung vision ng group
Cooking ---i don't know how to cook, pero i looove to eat! heehee!

gusto ko pa sana mag Juventus...kaso.. wag na lang. Hahaha!

kasi bukod dyan, meron pa akong:

BUSKOLEHIYO ---College Publication team
Class Representatives ---Class representatives... hahaha!

"Nasa pagdadala lang yan..."

wala lang, nagchi-chikahan kami ni jm kahapon ng maalala ko ang mga kabutihang naidulot ng batang si roman sa buhay ko. si roman ay isa sa dalawang batchmate kong tumawag sa kin ng 'ate'. actually, pag matino ako, tawag nya sa kin yun, pero pag medyo basag-ulo mode ako, 'Jessa' na tawag nya sa kin. Di masyadong malambing si Roman, usually tahimik lang sya and mukang masungit. Kaya lagi ko syang sinasabihang ngumiti kahit konti. I deeply apprecialte the times na nag-aadvice sya sa kin or samin ni Cielo. Hanga ako kay roman sa tibay ng loob nya, di ko pa sya nakitang magalit, badtrip, oo, pero galit, hindi pa. Tahimik nga kasi sya, kung galit sya, sinasarili nya lang, patunay nun ang right hand nya. Mabait si Roman, thoughtful sya, naalala ko pag badtrip ako, or pag sad ako, sya yung laging nattyempo na nandun para kumausap sa kin. Naalala ko one time, i was super exhausted na dahil sa preparations para sa Senakulo namin nung March 2007. Sya yung nagcomfort sa kin, at nagsabing, lahat kami napapagod. Lahat ng tao may kanya-kanyang ikinakapagod. that made me realize one thing, lahat ng tao, nay dinadalang mabigat na problema, ang tanong lang dyan, kung pano mo dadalhin yun. Naisip ko, yung mga classmates kong sems, di naman sila immune sa problema eh, pero di evident sa kanilang may problema sila kasi they know how to carry themselves. I don't know Roman well, i am basing this lang on my encounters with him. Pero i am proud of this guy. Very proud, keep it up, 'man.

One trait I learn from Roman is resilience. Parang bamboo plant, sumasabay sa agos, pero hindi nagpapadala pag tinutumba na sya ng hangin. Mabugbog man, tumatayo pa rin. Nappractice ko na ng konti yung resilience. Konting tyaga pa.

I know kung matuloy si Roman sa pagpapari, magiging magaling syang Salesian. mabuti kasi syang tao, great faith: check, great personality: check, good heart: check! o diba. Swerte ko sa "batchmates" ko, di kasi ako napapariwara pag kasama ko sila, i think it is a good thing na pag may naiisip akong kalokohan, naiisip ko kung anong sasabihin nila pag nalaman nila, kaya napipigilan ako, kaya everyday i pray for them eh, kasi they keep me sane. hehehe!

pag kakamustahin ko si roman, lagi lang nyang sagot, "Eto, buhay pa." Minsan nakakainis, and minsan super predictable na ito ang isasagot nya, parang ang babaw ng dating sa kin nung una, pero kung iisipin, tama naman, buhay pa tayo, and it is something to be thankful for. We have the chance to make today better than yesterday, We have the opportunity to see the world one more, yeah, siguro our worlds are not as pretty as we want them to be, pero sabi nga ni roman, "Nasa pagdadala lang yan."

Creative Writing

(photo from http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/GAN/NAY-022M~Eggplant-Posters.jpg)

This morning, in our Creative Writing Class we were made to pick an item from this creepy jar Mr. Vergara brought to class. The activity freaked me out, especially the picking part. I got a wilt eggplant. It was crinkly and dry...all the life sucked out of it. We were made to write whatever came to our minds, my classmates had items like a Barney stuffed toy, a piece of clay, a toy lizard and other stuff like that.

I was commended for my work, it's an emo-ish piece of shit. hehehe!

Useless. I hate the feeling of being useless. I want to be busy. I want to work. I work hard, i work hard. Then I'm wilt, I get tired. My colors fade, I shine less. Useless. I get sad, I think of myself as someone so invaluable, so small, so powerless. Useless. Death. I die a thousand deaths even before my body would. I die when i see them happy without me. Useless. I die when i can't be with him. I die when he cries, I die when he's quiet. I die when he's bitter, I die when i get blamed. I die, slowly, slowly. I die when i smile and cry inside. I cry when i am at peace with Him. I cry when i miss the kiss. I die. I let go when i die, then i hold back again when i come alive. I come alive when they smile. I am alive. But time will come, their s,miles won't make me alive. Then i am truly dead. I die. I'll be useless when i die. I die when i am scared. I die when i see frogs. I die little by little. I die when my mommy cries, i die when my kuya's being the ass that he really is . I die, I died when Fr. Roel left three years ago. Useless. When i can't do the things i am told. I lose my head, i wilt, my colors fade, my shine falters me. I am scared, i am petrified of lizards, snakes and frogs, of rats and of fluffy creatures, dead or alive, they're scary. I die. I scream, i shout. Then I'm tired, I write, I clear my head, I cry, I sleep. i see Barney and i get this nasty feeling, I see mangoes and I remember home. I see snakes I remember my mom, I see a piece of clay i remember my daddy. He's dead, he's dead. He's a wilt piece of something and nothing will change that. He got tired. I am in pain. He died. He's dead. He was killed. I've been killed before I've been killed. Then i am dead. Useless, lifeless, wilt. I'm dead.

Happy Birthday, Jules!

JULES BRIAN D. PUNSALAN, a guy with a smile that can light up any room, a guy with great beauty in and out and an even greater love for our Lord.

Jules has this air of mystery.I find it hard reading his emotions, he’s very unpredictable, but in a nice way. Jules is very cute, we often name him as “the pinaka-gwapong Bosconian ng DB Canlubang”, and many people agree. Yeah, he may have his flaws, but he carries them with grace, he embraces them and he makes them work for him. More than the physical attributes, Jules’ personality is very striking, and he’s friendly and very approachable. His charm adds up to his “pogi points.” Jules is a very humble person, he’s reserved and quiet most of the times but he’s very funny too. He’s not afraid of laughing his mistakes as he resolves to do better next time. I admire Jules for being very dedicated in the things he does, he’s very diligent especially with his studies. My personal encounters with this fellow are like my daily dose of sanity. I am a year older than him but he would always sound like he’s my kuya. He gives advises well. Honestly, nahihiya pa rin ako sa kanya even though we have been friends for almost two years now. I like it when Jules reads, especially when he reads something he wrote, i feel his sincerity when i hear his voice. That’s why i treasure the times he shares a part of his life with me. Indeed, i can say that i am very blessed to meet him. He knows how to comfort people when they are sad, he has this cute smile that works every time. I like it too when he makes kulit with us. I remember three things when i think of Jules, roosters, rosary and the song “Life is a Beautiful Thing.” Jules likes roosters, he even knows the names of the breeds! Rosary: when i was very distraught and depressed, he gave me a rosary and he said that it was special for him, since then, I have always kept that rosary close to me. Life is a Beautiful Thing: Jules is a reminder for me that life is a beautiful thing. “Kahit na may problema, nabubuhay pa rin tayo, parte lang naman ng buhay ang problema.” Without exaggeration, I believe that Jules is an angel not just to me but also to those whose lives he’s touched.

whining, crying, screaming

now i feel the pain of living in two worlds, two worlds that are oblivious to the existence of the other. I am caught in between two things: the place where i want to be in, and the place where i am expected to be in. I feel pain because of the fact that i cannot do anything but just sit and wait for things to fall (hopefully, whenre i want them to be.) Right now, i am not sure of what i want, i am not sure of what i feel, i am not sure. Well, what's new, i have lived most of my life in uncertainty, i have lived most of my life, not planning ahead, living each day as if it was my last. But you know what, honestly, it gets a little too tiring.

I need a hand to hold on to, but i am not sure which hand to take. my heart is broken, but these things make it whole, the irony of loving is starting to take its toll on me. Forgive me for feeling like i am being punished for the choices i have made in the past. I given another chance, i would have chosen better, but thinking about it, if i knew that this was to happen i would have played safe, i would have learned nothing from all these. i am not regretting the choices i have made, the pain is worth it, i just feel sad for the people i might be hurting because of these.

i am confused. i feel like i am getting myself in a big commitment. i cannot have the best of both worlds, for a while, it could work for me, but there would come a time wehre i would have to make a decision and just stick with one and let go of the other.

if all else fails, i could let go of both and start anew. (READ: total self-destruction)

pain and agony combo...

i am starting to get bored with having to go to class everyday and read a whole lot of stuff that clearly doesn't make sense to me. I am very bored and i need to do something better with my life. I have tried to make some sense out of the thigs i usually do. I attended the volleyball try-outs last Saturday. Instead of making me feel beter, i even felt worse than before. My arms hurt badly, i can't even move them properly. We did push ups, sit ups, jogging, stretching, and a whole lot of body movements that is not normally done by sane people. After three days, my left arm has started to regain it's normal condition but my right arm is starting to get worse. I am thinking of waiting for it to decay and just have it amputated. I cried over my arms last night. I can't sleep well and i wake up really early. I can't rest well because of this.

this is what you call working for what you want, i want to play volleyball, i must go through the pains and hardships, this got me to think, do i really want this. Parang sakit lang ng katawan abot ko dito.

procastinator no more...(wanna bet?)

people talk shit when you're not like them...with the big 'L' in the forehead.
it's like them telling you you'll never amount to something when you're...you.

shit happens.

**deja vu ba ito? pangalawang beses ko na ieencode ang entry na ito. nag shut down ang computer na ginamot ko kamina, yun ang kagandahan ng pageencode gamit ang blogger, may auto save sila, eh pag nagccross post lang ako, from multiply to blogger, wala. kaya sa mga ganung pagkakataon, uulitin ko sa umpisa, pag minamalas ka nga naman**

"Malalaman mo lang ang tunay na halaga ng isang bagay sa'yo pag nawala na sila sa'yo."


time check: 6:38 p.m.


True, and baaaadtrip, ngayon ko lang narerealize tong mga bagay na 'to. ngayon ako nalulungkot, umiiyak...miss ko na high school friends ko...Karen, Amae, Marou, Lara, Efrel, and Donna too...nakakaguilty pero parang i practically pushed memories with them aside kasi masaya na ako ngayon. naiinis ako sa sarili ko kasi all the while i thought sila yung umiwan sa kin, whereas ako pala nagtulak sa kanila palayo, ako yung nang-iwan. Kung tutuusin , sila parin yung best set of friends that i ever had...sila kasi yung nagtyaga sa kin for the longest time, for years and years, they've been patient with me, sa mga kadramahan ko, sa kaartehan ko, sa kaligaligan ko, sa mga tantrums ko, sa pangungulit ko, sa kasungitan ko, never nila ako iniwan, never sila nagreklamo, parang kahit i was in my self destructive mode na, they loved me pa rin. Hanga ako sa tolerance nila, and ngayon ko lang narerealize to? i am such an ungrateful bum. i hate it.

miss ko na silang lahat. lalo na si karen. i am very sorry for what has become of us. i hope it's not yet too late. nakakainis. nakakafrustrate. back to basics...bago ako makarating kung san man, sila ang pinanggalingan ko...


time check: 7:38 p.m.

You'll always be my Baby

got hooked to A.I. when i heard David Cook sing this song...

oooh! so in love right now.

Always Be my Baby
David Cook

we were as one babe
for a moment in time
and it seemed everlasting
that you would always be mine
now you want to be free
so I'm letting you fly
cause i know in my heart babe
our love will never die,no!

you'll always be a part of me
i'm a part of you indefinitely
boy don't you know you can't escape me
ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
and we'll linger on
time can't erase a feeling this strong
no way you're never gonna shake me
ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

i ain't gonna cry no
and i won't beg you to stay
if you're determined to leave boy
i will not stand in your way
but inevitably you'll be back again
cause ya know in your heart babe
our love will never end no

you'll always be a part of me
i'm part of you indefinitely
boy don't you know you can't escape me
ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
and we'll linger on
time can't erase a feeling this strong
no way you're never gonna shake me
ooh darlin cause you'll always be my baby

i know that you'll be back boy
when your days and your nights get a little bit colder ooohhh
i know that,you'll be right back, baby
oh, baby believe me it's only a matter of time
of time

you'll always be a part of me
i'm part of you indefinitely
boy don't you know you can't escape me
ooh darlin cause you'll always be my baby
and we'll linger on (and we will linger on)
time cant erase a feeling this strong
no way you're never gonna shake me
ooh darlin cause you'll always be my baby