Tuesday, August 21, 2007

on love...

"Love is not something to be over-analyzed. it's supposed to be spontaneous and involuntary for it is an activity of the heart."

in memory of our Murphy...

totally terrified of what i knew was about to happen, i came late for my biology class...
we were about to kill, skin and open up a frog... what we had wasn't really a frog, it was a toad (read: bigger) i was terrified... sir oliver demonstrated how to paralyze the frog, i sat in the corner crying until kuya ron told me to get up and join the group. i did join them, but i was not looking at whatever they were doing. after a few words of encouragement from almost everyone, i found myself holding the feet of the toad as kuya ron was pithing the head. then i said to myself, "*snap* they actually talked me into doing this thing." i was crying of course... i cried like a kid, like a baby, it was quite embarrassing, now that i look back at it, but at that time,i didn't really care... all i was thinking of was the toad. when it was dead, i helped in skinning it. i found inspiration from grey's anatomy. hahaha! it was there that i realized that i could be a surgeon. we named our frog "Murphy". He was a good frog. He didn't give us a hard time though it took quite a while to kill him completely. I will miss Murphy. But i am still terrified of frogs and toads, especially if they're alive and croaking.

Friday, August 10, 2007

College Retreat

Life is like a pencil...

1. there is something good in you.
2. you need to be sharpened in order to live.
3. in case of mistakes, you are provided with an eraser.
4. remember, somebody is holding you.
5. you have to leave a mark.

Our three-day retreat focused on the pencil module. the points stressed are quite self-explanatory. I enjoyed the retreat. It felt good going back into myself. I needed a break from all the drama and the chaos my life has brought me. I needed this break. In fact, I need more breaks like this. I am not as strong as I seem. I am no super-human. I am weak. In fact, the bruises on my arm would prove that i do not do well with stress. I am an angry person. Very angry, incapable of loving truly, at least not yet. I need to settle things first. I need to solve my issues. I need somebody to talk to. I am tired of running away from everything. I want to talk about what happened almost 14 years ago. I want to speak up.