Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The Search

The Search

Romain Gary

(1914- )

I am an escape artist. I try to find my way out of the bad situations I get myself into. I always try to find the easy way out. I am not contented with my life. When the times that I am unhappy with the way things go for me, I try to make myself believe that I am living in a different world. I pretend that I don’t know this life. Sometimes, reality scares me to the point that I almost want to give up on living and just escapes. Many times I have imagined myself just drifting far from where I am right now.

I have always tried to prove my worth to the people around me, I hate being compared to people, especially when I know that I’ll never be of the same level as that certain someone. As I was growing up, I was always compared to my best friend; she’s smart and pretty, very talented and friendly. I am not that. I have lived my high school life trying to make people see that I am smart but I don’t want to be recognized. I don’t want to exhaust myself trying to get all the medals available for awarding. I was only able to step out of the shadows when I left UPLB. It was a drastic move to make everyone see that I am not willing to be someone else’s dummy. Escaping out of the shadows, I did that being a deviant. Defying the norms and disobeying the rules my society has imposed on me. I am an escape artist.